Pitty Party

I'm sitting here crying, so frustrated I could scream and am ready to throw in the towel for the day (it's only 2).  I have gotten about 10 hours of sleep total in the past 2 nights.  I'm tired.  I would say that this insomnia is getting old but it's already there. IT'S OLD!  Hayden is sick (a cold).  I had arrangements for a friend to watch him while I went to my doctor apt today, but because he is sick I didn't want to take him in case he's contagious.  I took him to the doctor with me.  After waiting almost an hour I finally saw the doctor for like 3 minutes and then left.  Hayden is busy. Very busy but he did pretty good.  I was so tired driving home from the doctor that I was very anxious to put him down for a nap.  

I laid him down and went right into my room and laid down.  He was quiet for almost 20 minutes, I breathed a sigh of relief and closed my eyes.  Quiet time stopped.  I went in to tell him to lay down and found quite the surprise.  He pooped his pants (which he hasn't done in over a month) and WIPED IT EVERYWHERE!  All over his bed, his walls, his stuffed animals, his pillow pet, and he was covered in it.  I just broke down and started crying.  Took him to the bathroom.  Wiped him down, and put him in his old crib.

Ok obviously this isn't  the end of the world, and I have a particular sister who would tell me to "get a grip" but when I'm lacking sleep (not to mention all of the pain and other stuff that I'm experiencing with pregnancy) I don't reason well, so I will just cry for a while.  I'm not going to yell at him, I'm not going to spank him.  He knows I'm sad, which I know makes him sad.  He's quiet up there.  Hopefully that means he's sleeping and not going for round two.  Unfortunately I'm too worked up to sleep.  My house smells like poo, I haven't touched his room (except I did wipe it off the walls so it doesn't stain them GROSS).  I'm just going to sit here, cry, feel sorry for myself and continue to throw this pitty party.  Hopefully tomorrow I will be able to laugh :)